Wedding Bells (AU, for gunslingerqueen) (NSFW)

[toweredingly]

Roland had woken with a headache and a sinking sense of cold dread, and neither were because of the large amounts of whiskey and graf he'd drunk the night before. It was a familiar feeling; the same steady almost-fear settled into his bones whenever he saw a battle looming. But battles could be fought with gunfire and cold rage, with all thought pushed aside and the world coming at you moment by moment. Today was worse. Today was politics.

He'd set aside his usual jerkin and jeans for more formal gear. The suit itself wasn't so bad, but he felt naked without his guns at his hip. It would have been good to have their comfort, even if he had no intent of using them. Their weight had always been like having a part of his father still with him, and all the gunslingers of their line before him. Now, when he most felt need of that reassurance, he had to set it aside. Clean-shaven and well-heeled, with his hair pulled back into a queue and his feet rubbed by the hard leather of new shoes, he felt like another man - and one even less capable of facing all that lay ahead.

The wedding was in the morning, before the real Fair-Day began. Then things would take their usual course; the castle flung open to the people, the feasting and singing and Fair-Day riddling, with raucous good humour and doubtless a few fights. That was manageable. He had lived that every Fair-Day for his whole life. What frightened him, more than he would ever admit, was the part that came before and after.

"You look more like a man going to put a noose around her neck than a ring around her finger," Bert commented in his ear, bringing him back to the present. For his part, Bert looked perfectly at ease in formal wear, sauntering about and regarding Roland with a critical eye. Whatever dark mood had been slithering about under the surface, he seemed to have excised it for now.

Roland answered with a grunt, looking back ruefully at the gunbelt hanging over the back of his chair, and closed his eyes for a moment. "Is there a difference?"

"Dinh or no dinh, I'm not beyond punching you. Just for once, Ro', try to stop living in whatever darkness is going on in that bony head of yours, and relax." For once, Bert wasn't smiling. He slung an arm around his friend's shoulders, looking at him closely. "She's not Susan. I kennit, Ro'. But she's what Susan would have wanted for you. Carry that with you, at least."

"Thankee, Bert." Patting Cuthbert on the back, Roland shook his head and started towards the door. Towards the Hall of the Ancestors, where Burtock Hattlen waited in lieu of a dinh, where Alain was standing by with a ring.

The hall was filled, to a casual eye, but Roland saw the empty spaces more than the full. No Cort, no Vannay, no Stephen Deschain in the high seat. Many who should have been seated in the best places were gone. Somehow, that made it easier to settle his mind, straighten his spine, and wait steady and watchful at the front of the hall for his bride.

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[toweredingly]

Roland let out a slightly strangled little sound as her nails dug into his skin, his sharp eyes on her, a little unfocused with arousal. Fuck, but that was hot. He didn't stop thrusting, although he slowed a little as she peaked, as much for the sake of his muscles as for anything to do with her. Stopping hardly seemed like an option just then. He might have the self-control, if he tried, but he wasn't about to strain himself over it, and his body had its own ideas. His breath was starting to hitch, his skin slicked with sweat as he pressed her up against the wall with all his weight, covering her mouth with his.

It was a couple of minutes before he came, letting out a low, guttural sound into the kiss, his whole body shuddering up against her. His hand had found its way back up into her hair, where it clenched spastically for a moment, then relaxed.

When he pulled away, gasping, he was smiling. For perhaps the first time she'd seen, there was no darkness behind it. It would return soon enough, but for now, it had been washed away. "Better?"

[gunslingerqueen]

She heard him but had no time to dissect whether it was a good or bad noise, she was so focused on herself and how he looked at her and how for the briefest second that sparked something that had nothing to do with sex. Thankfully it didn't survive very long, couldn't when she hit the apex of it and if really, if he hadn't slowed down then it was half likely to have kept going on and it was too early to end up that worn out. Caught between the wall and him she didn't have any choice but to keep kissing, no other way to help him to it, so she focused wholly on that. Both hands ended up in his hair and messing it up the way she had wanted to since one particular moment over a week ago.

A couple minutes or not, she wasn't in any sort of a rush and there was something to be said for feeling it happen a little slower until he came. What really got her was his smile and this time it didn't bother her that it was so disarming. She just grinned, bright-eyed and happy in a way that she hadn't felt in months.

"I think I'm supposed to be asking you that," Her voice was airy and thin, but inherently cheerful. "Much, much, much better." She didn't know how he might feel about littler forms of affection, if he would prefer that she not do anything, but she risked it and kissed his neck, made a little trail downward while she spoke, "Good to know that I don't ever have to fake it!"

[toweredingly]

"I hope you wouldn't, in any case." He didn't protest at her kisses, but slowly pulled out of her, moving to set her back on her feet. His breathing was still a little ragged, but only a little; he was fit, and he recovered quickly. "If ever it reaches the point where you have to pretend, I'd sooner know about it." He said it gravely, as if he were worried she might not take it on board, and leant in to kiss her on the forehead.

It was good to see her like that, satisfied and smiling. Maybe it was strange that the first time he felt like he'd made her feel at home was right after fucking her up against a wall, but he wasn't about to complain. Even as the relaxed contentment of his afterglow began to withdraw, the reality of the situation creeping back in, it was worth something to know that something today had gone well.

His thumb traced the mark he'd left on her collarbone, and he smiled again, just a little. "If this goes on," he mused aloud, "we'll both be carrying each other's marks for weeks." There were worse things.

[gunslingerqueen]

She paused and winced a bit at his exit. She had never liked the feeling much but he couldn't hold her against the wall the entire time, so she chose a spot she liked best and set about giving him a mark, too.

"That you would say that at all means that will never be the case." Because an attentive lover, one who would hear and honest opinion that was not meant to hurt feelings, was always a good one. "Just know that we share that thought." Certain things were what they happened to be but she would be damned if he ever had to try and be with another woman to be physically satisfied. She could at least get that much right.

She only paused to grin, her forehead temporarily resting on his shoulder. His contentment might be ebbing but she was still a ball of barely restrained affection. "I like that idea, feel free to leave as many as you like, wherever it pleases you." She returned to her personal mission, this time aiming up a little higher, biting with the littlest bit of force to really make it last, while she gently pushed them forward and hopefully towards the bed. Better than standing, and better for what she wanted to do. There was probably at least a bit of time before anyone came knocking, right? Hopefully.

[toweredingly]

Roland let himself be guided back towards the bed without complaint, his fingers weaving into her hair as they went. "Harder for a man to lie about such things," he commented, looking down at her. "We wear it rather more obviously than you." Which seemed particularly appropriate, since his cock, while still soft, was already to starting to twitch its interest again. If the night went on as it seemed like it might, he thought dryly, he would be too tired to move from bed for days after.

Just at the moment, that didn't seem like a particularly horrific fate. If nothing else, it kept his responsibilities off his mind for the time being. Sitting down on the bed, his legs splayed, he ran a hand down her side, enjoying the warmth and solidity of her. Yes, he could definitely go along with this.

[gunslingerqueen]

"True," But it was harder for a woman to go out and find someone else for pleasure. At least it would be difficult for her. A man could have someone else and she doubted anyone would care much about her displeasure for it. But that was a complicated topic for a number of reasons, better to leave it for some other time, or possibly never.

Better to enjoy how easy things were now, and that she could take her time enjoying and getting to know as much of him with her lips as possible. His neck, his collarbone, the length of his chest and farther down still, she touched before she kissed or licked, but there was no major part left untouched. It gave her time to be thorough in the way she needed and, young or not, it was an extra bit of time for him, too, so that by the time she dropped to her knees again he might not need her hand for very long before the obvious occurred.

[toweredingly]

Resting back on his elbows, Roland watched her, still as stone, his skin prickling pleasurably under her touch. He was tacky with sweat, his hair all mussed and any semblance of his earlier neatness gone. It suited him rather better than the sharp outfit and slicked-back hair.

Sure enough, by the time she worked her way down that far, he was most of the way to hard again, and it was starting to tell in his breath, which had lost some of its evenness. It only took a few seconds of her stroking before his cock stood to attention again, and he looked at her with a certain light in his eyes, sitting up a little straighter.

[gunslingerqueen]

The silence hardly bothered her, he could have been babbling about almost anything in the world and she might have just given him the most distracted responses. In her own way and with many more tasks than just this, she could be single-minded. If her actions didn't make that clear then maybe the coy smirk she gave him would, an answer to the shift in his posture that she couldn't have missed.

But she took her time with it all the same, her fingers didn't stop just because she parted her lips and traced her tongue along the base of him and worked up, far too light and careful to be satisfying, too deliberate to have been anything but the tease that it was. And for those first few seconds, at least, she never looked away from those unfair, blue eyes. When her lips met the same space as her hand it only meant switching off, her lips wrapping around his tip, her hand touching as her eyes finally closed. Teasing was fun but there was an ulterior motive to this. The best thing anyone could do was find every little pleasure and weakness and then not only shamelessly exploit it, but find ways to make it new. It was just a matter of finding the littler details, but maybe he was beginning to see the extent of her dedication.

[toweredingly]

She was good. He wasn't about to pretend otherwise; wasn't about to hide the shiver that went up his spine when her tongue brushed against the hypersensitive skin. Once upon a time, when he had been younger and less experienced (not to mention less well-used already), that alone might have been enough to bring him off, or close to it. As it was, he just half-closed his eyes, relaxing into it, one hand sliding down to toy with her hair. She was good. And, with that initial urgent need gone, he was more than happy to let her show that off for as long as she liked.

At some point tonight, he reflected as a particularly sensitive spot tugged a little gasp out of him, he was going to have to repay the favour. She looked good on her knees, but he thought she might look just as good from a vantage point between her legs. Besides, the way she was teasing cried out for revenge.

For now, though, he settled into her ministrations, twisting his fingers into her hair and occasionally letting out a low, voiceless sound of appreciation when she hit a particularly sweet spot.

[gunslingerqueen]

Even if her general appreciation for sucking a man's dick - especially one she actually liked - had been nonexistent Nariko would have always enjoyed this just for the sake of getting a reaction. Men that were entirely silent during sex were vaguely menacing and not to be trusted, and also no fun at all as far as she was concerned. For Roland a gasp or sigh might as well have been her equivalent to a true moan so in that moment she was nothing short of pleased with life.

She hummed appreciatively when he played with her hair but otherwise concerned herself with enjoying this for as long as possible. For her that meant working farther down, running her tongue along his skin, sucking with no regard for how loud or even lewd it might be. Eventually both hands settled easily on his hips as she moved shallowly, working him and out of her throat in small bursts at first, to get used to it and to, y'know, not pass out. Being conscious was pretty sexy most of the time, in her opinion.

[toweredingly]

That hum resonated right to the core of him, and he let out a little groan, his fingers tightening for a moment on her hair before he relaxed again. It was far from the first time someone had sucked him off, but he had to appreciate her dedication to it, if nothing else. For the moment, with her mouth warm and wet around him and her hair thick and soft against his fingers, the universe focused down to the two of them. It was a profoundly gratifying feeling, for someone who'd spent so long lately with the weight of the world on his shoulders.

Part of him whispered that maybe that kind of complacency was dangerous, that in the past when he had let the world focus down to so little, it had led to nothing but pain. He tensed a little at the thought, but it was easy to salve with the feeling of her lips and tongue. One night. He could have one night.

[gunslingerqueen]

They were about as close as two people could be and she wasn't so closed off in her own purpose that she was magically incapable of paying attention to things that were not Roland's cock. She looked up at him evenly but didn't stop, being overly worried would invite too much trouble. Besides, that little shift could have been a number of things, she was no mind reader after all, but in case his own decision wasn't moving enough there was that look in her eyes. The shut up and let someone else take care of you for once look.

Hopefully he would listen because she was done teasing, now she just wanted to make him come again. Playing around was slow and unhurried, everything else was instinct and intelligence. If he could honestly think through how quickly she sped up and the gratuitous implementation of his weaknesses, all of which she remembered and put to use no matter what it required, a curl of her tongue here or there, pressing, sucking, didn't really matter. If he couldn't have one night he could certainly have one damn blowjob.

[toweredingly]

As distractions went, that ranked pretty highly. He groaned aloud, both hands in her hair now, his hips bucking a little against her, and any thoughts of pain and war driven out for the time being in favour of the waves of pleasure she was sending through him. Later, looking back on it, he would be impressed by just how fast and easily she had learnt his sweet spots. For now, that level of cogent thought was just a little bit beyond him.

Even with how recently he had come, it was only a few moments before he was gasping, his fingers tight in her hair, his eyes closed. "Fuck!" he ground out through his teeth, and spilt out into her mouth, his back arching. "Fuck," he repeated a moment later, falling back against the mattress, and let out a little huff that might have been a laugh. "Thankee, sai."

[gunslingerqueen]

There, see, that was the improvement she had wanted! Good job, Roland, good job! And to herself as well, of course. For the most part she wasn't surprised by any of it, hell, he was basically polite about it, he didn't even force himself down her throat. If that wasn't kind then she didn't really know what was! If she wanted to do anything but swallow, she could have, he was very clearly at the edge and then suddenly very clearly over it. But she hadn't done this in a while and he was her husband and she wanted to and that was all that really counted.

She let him go to sit up and kneel on the bed beside him, catching an errant bit off of her lips and licking it up. "Roland, we're married, and you know my name well. 'Na-ri-ko', you can even say 'Riko' if it makes you happy. Not that you should be thanking me for something I've wanted to do since yesterday, even before that kiss." To her they were well beyond this 'sai' business, though she understood that he might have meant it in a particular way, considering, so she still grinned and still kissed his forehead. "Better?"

[toweredingly]

"You have a mouth that could drive a man mad," Roland replied, meeting her eyes, and turned his face up to kiss the mouth in question. He could taste his own salty bitterness on her lips, when he bit down lightly on her lower lip. "Don't mock me. You can see damn well that I am." He smiled a little, running a hand back through his sweat-slicked curls.

A moment later, there was a knock on the door. Sighing, Roland got to his feet and slung a sheet around his waist, looking down at her. "Well, I suppose now we both stink of sweat and come, there are worse times for a bath."

[gunslingerqueen]

"And to think you're the lucky man that gets it all to yourself." She groaned gently, but bite or not she laughed easily at that. "Oh, I just wanted to be completely sure of it, that's all!" If they hadn't been interrupted she would have started what might have been the most epic kissing session Gilead's walls would have ever seen, but there was that knock.

"Probably," She grinned and found the blanket she had made since he had the sheet, and unfolded it enough to at least cover the important pieces. That she was visibly naked from a side view was no big deal. "But I was going to ask you to join me no matter what so it worked out very well!"

la la la ruining everything again~

[toweredingly]

Roland smiled back at her as he went to go and answer the door. His smile, though, vanished when he found that there were two people there. The maid with the water buckets was easy enough to deal with - he just stepped aside to let her in - but Alain was there too, grim-faced and with blood on the collar of his shirt. Roland didn't let out the curse that rose to his lips, but he tensed visibly, looking back over at Nariko with his face back to its usual grim mask. "Hold that thought," he suggested, scraping his fingers back through his hair, and turned back to Alain. "What is it?"

Alain's eyes flickered briefly to Nariko, his colour rising, and he lowered his voice a little. "They know you have it. And they know what it does, how it corrupts. Roland. Someone's been through your study."

And there went any remnants of contentment. The hairs on the back of Roland's neck prickled, and he glanced back over his shoulder at Nariko and the maid. "Did they take it?"

"No. Though the mess is considerable." Alain fingered the blood on his collar, half-closing his eyes. "It's singing out to them, Roland. He was headed straight for it. Whatever we do now, it can't stay there forever."

"We'll find a better place tomorrow," Roland said, after a moment's thought, glancing back at Nariko again. "We can't afford to move it tonight. Not with all this still going on. Can you keep watch on it tonight?"

Alain grimaced. "It scrapes at the inside of my mind like nails on glass, Roland. But I'll watch over it, aye." Again, he looked past Roland at Nariko. "Cry pardon. I didn't mean to interrupt."

they just can't ever have nice things

[gunslingerqueen]

Who could have ever thought that she might loathe that expression more than the first time she saw it? Certainly not her. Still, Nariko waited and did her best to retain some hope that it wasn't really that bad. Maybe a complicated scuffle, maybe something to do with Jacquard, but she knew that wasn't the case even as she smiled politely at Alain, still doing nothing more to hide herself.

The maid did her job while Nariko caught snippets of their talk, and answered every glance that came her way with a raised brow. Did they expect her to be somewhere else? Or to magically fly up from the bed and attack one of them? She wasn't exactly in a state to run off. But for Alain, who had already survived the formality of the wedding itself and now this, she could manage to brush off the irritation. "I know, Alain, I hope you are alright." She wasn't so far off that she hadn't been able to bend a bit to catch sight of the blood.

Genuine concern or not, though, the sooner Alain was gone the sooner she would be tasked with figuring out the state of her husband. If she trusted her instincts and the lines of his body then she would be forced to admit that there might not be any reclaiming the calm they'd found. But what were instincts? Annoying, that was what they were ... And hopefully wrong.

story of roland's life tbh

[toweredingly]

After a moment, Alain left, leaving Roland to rest his forehead against the doorframe for a moment while he steadied himself. One night. One night of peace, after all the struggles of the day. Had it really been so much to ask?

Nodding to the maid as she dried her hands and hurried away, he closed the door after her and moved back over to sit on the bed, head in his hands and sheet still around his waist. "The next person to bring me bad news," he commented at last, rather bitterly, "will be lucky not to get my boot in their belly." It was a joke, or as much as one as someone so humourless could summon up with the immense weariness that was currently coming over him. At the same time, though, it might not be so far from true. He might have been able to manage, had it not been for that hope, however brief, of letting it go for the night.

Then is it good or bad that he's stuck with a woman that won't give up on the nice things

[gunslingerqueen]

There was no real privacy until the maid left and Nariko waited impatiently for that, wanting to be at his side with all the protective instinct of an infuriated animal. But the idea of having anyone see her or them in that state was unsettling so she might have glared at said maid, just a little. When he was near her she let the blanket go, far more concerned with reaching out and carding her fingers through his hair, trying to soothe him even by just a fraction of an inch.

"You won't have to, the next time someone knocks on the door I'll open it, and you won't have to deal with it. 'Not just yours to carry' and all that." Unless there was a true fight, or someone was dead she could tell people to fuck off, it wasn't that difficult.

"Roland, look at me," Even if he didn't she certainly looked at him, just not with her usual stubborn, hardheaded nature, now it was something gentler, just as imploring but not with such a lack of subtlety. "Everything was fine as it could be, and it can go right back to that. We are both still here, and what's wrong can wait until the morning, I promise, so there's no sense in wasting warm bath water. I have enough silly questions to distract you for the rest of the night." She slid off of the bed but didn't quite let go, nor did she forcefully pull him. "You can listen to them or find a way to shut me up after getting through at least three, those are the only options."

probably good. he needs someone to kick him out of being a depressive ass.

[toweredingly]

He half-smiled, a twitch of the mouth that didn't reach his eyes. Bone-weary as he was, worried as he was, it was more of a relief than he could comfortably admit to have her treat it so matter-of-factly. It took some of the weight off him, even if it did nothing to soothe the gnawing discomfiture in his gut. The whole situation felt like it was running out of his control. Having someone other than him take control, even of so small a part... that wasn't nothing.

"Three, I can manage," he said after a moment, unwinding the sheet from his hips and letting himself be guided to his feet. "Beyond that, no promises." But he looked at her with a new kind of fondness, one hand going out to rest for a moment on her hip.

now lets just hope she never really kicks him

[gunslingerqueen]

She would take far more if she thought he might let her. It was clear as sunlight to her that he was capable of handling this war, that he was in fact capable of things most other people could never be, but the pressure he was under was just too much. Maybe with time he could feel better with sharing more of it. She couldn't pretend to know how to sooth his personal suffering but that wasn't the only way to help someone help themselves.

Right now getting this much out of him was a victory so even if he couldn't smile with his eyes she did, and brightly enough for them both.

"Ahh," She leaned up as much as she could to kiss his jaw, "But what if you get a surprise for answering five?" Not that there was any guarantee ... But something could be worked out! The first few steps were taken backwards, but before she turned around she flashed him that same smile, and took his hand loosely. To the tub!! Except once there she deliberately got in before him, making sure to press her back against one end, her hair hanging over the edge because it wasn't worth getting it wet. If he thought he was getting away from an embrace here Roland was well and truly insane.

i'm pretty sure if they got in a physical fight they would destroy everything around them

[toweredingly]

"I'd say that depends on what the surprise is. And what the questions are." He stepped into the tub after her, hesitating for a bare moment before settling back against her. Really, the tub was too short for him as it was, even without her in it as well; when he settled in, his knees were lifted almost to his chest. But that was fine. What was less comfortable, although he did his best not to show it, was resting up against her this way. Not physically, of course. The problem was with relaxing against her, with the pervasive feeling that he was trying to put off his responsibilities, weighing her down with them as much as with his body. The problem was that sex was one thing, but closeness was another.

He shook off the feeling, resting his head back on her shoulder and looking up at her. "Go ahead. Ask."

Oh, without a doubt! Which is why imo it's a simultaneously terrifying and exciting idea

[gunslingerqueen]

"Hm. I'd say you could freely request my mouth whenever you want and wherever we are at least once but, frankly, you could just do that normally anyway. Oh! How about I'll freely punch someone you can't, and get myself out of it. Like if someone irritates you but they're too important, so I just go and do it for you? Something like that!" She was kidding! Sort of! ... Not ... Really, in fact not at all! But that was fine, right? He might see his weight as a burden but Nariko only wrapped her arms around his middle and relaxed entirely, accepting his presence without a second thought. For her it was comforting to be able to take care of someone again, and the context didn't need to be romantic for it to happen, either.

"Alright, first question ..." She pretended as if she hadn't already thought it out, and so her expression was purposefully over dramatic before she said, "Favorite color!"

it would be so disastrous and thus clearly needs to happen

[toweredingly]

He had to think about that, perhaps a ridiculous amount. He never had been one for that kind of question. Favourite colours didn't play into his life, and so he'd never thought about it.

"White," he said at last. "Or, if that doesn't count, then blue." Both were more based on the first thing to come into his mind than on any real favourite, but that was no bad thing. It was, at least, the distraction she'd promised.